Earthquake

At 3:20 on Sunday morning I jumped out of bed, waking up from a deep sleep to the reality of an earthquake. I was far enough from where the earthquake actually caused damage, but during the first moments of uncertainty my mind was already racing: Safety/phone/keys/shoes/gas?/emergency backpack/I’ll miss my meeting across the bridge today/Get information/Send text/Escape or stay?

It took me a while to wind down. But I did. Part of winding down had to do, of course, with the fact that I was unharmed and that people close to me were also safe. But another part of it had to do with my state of mind: the conviction that I had some control over the situation. I had enough understanding of what was going on, and I could make choices regarding what I was going to do.  

Wait long enough and life is going to come up with earthquakes of some sort, big and small. Just like you can’t stop an earthquake from happening, many other events in life cannot be prevented or changed. But we can work on understanding and on developing choices. This is true for ourselves and for those who are under our care. It can be hard to explain things to people, young or not, whose communication skills are lacking, but it’s worth a try. They may understand more than we expect, and they may appreciate being addressed. And offering choices, even small ones, can often help a person feel less helpless, even if those choices cannot make the earthquake go away and cannot even lessen it. I hope you will share your experiences as comments below.